Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
