Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
this will be a night to untag.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
