I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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