Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I need to align my fucking chakras
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
