I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
