you win again, gameday.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
