You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
So vagazzling was a success
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I currently don't understand fingers.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
