Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
