Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
