So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize