I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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