I wish i was in the wii world.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
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