On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
