brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
