im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
