I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
