so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
