That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
