haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
