I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Can I color on your dick again?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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