just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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