Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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