Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
