im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
