i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize