Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
