How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
