let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
