Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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