So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
