Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
