White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
