its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
i need to put some appletini on your dick
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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