i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
