My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
