but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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