sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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