I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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