weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
