their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
