the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
