If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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