I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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