Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
