I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
