her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
