dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
We don't watch enough power rangers
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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