She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
