it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
