Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Randomize
